POEMS by Jenn Zukowski and Jack Collom, April 2001


Q: One lump or two? 

A: Just one big one’ll about cover it.

Q: Who’s the boss?

A: That guy with the ears.

Q: Or is he?

A: Well, he just flapped outa here. Now what?

Q: Yeah, now what?

A: Okay, okay, um… why don’t we get the committee on that?

Q: Did that count as a question?

A: Just as sure as it rains little tin goslings.

Q: Okay. Let’s get serious. Where are we?

A: With the pelicans, of course. An interplanetary time vortex. But the real question is,

Q: How do we get out of here? 

A: Play like a dead fish and let Pelican Transport take over — we’ll all get lumped in together.

Try to be kind to me, dear, or I’ll shoot you with my cold .41–

Whoa, man, can you stop for a minute? If you shoot me my life is done.

Oh shit, but a new song starts in three minutes.
Too bad, Dude Ranch, you knew the job was dangerous.

(Rumble rumble) … I’m trying to start my Rolls Royce SUV.

Aw crap, not you too! Here, let me get out the

Crank: (rrrrrr… phut phut…) Whoosh! Hey, what’s that big bump in the road,

Kilimanjaro? Holy Hornets! It can’t be! Turn left, no, right, no…

(Smasssh crash tinkle) — This is no time or place for a tinkle. Now look what you’ve done…



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